


Crimson Rain

by Spunky0ne



Category: Bleach
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-10-02
Updated: 2014-10-18
Packaged: 2018-02-19 13:47:42
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 17,015
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2390591
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Spunky0ne/pseuds/Spunky0ne
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>When a simple mistake leaves Byakuya and Renji pregnant with each others' child, the two friends agree to raise the children separately. But when Renji suffers a devastating loss, Byakuya is forced to watch as his friend and subordinate slowly falls apart...yaoi, mpreg, angst...Ren/Bya/Ren</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. The Haze

"Damn, Taichou! Do you think it will ever stop raining?" Renji sighed, looking out from within the shelter they knelt in, "It's been going on like that for days. I don't know about you, but I'm really looking forward to a steamy bath and a huge bowl of hot stew when we get home."

"That does sound agreeable," the noble replied quietly, his dark grey eyes looking out into the storm, "However, we still have a mission to see to. Although we have found several clues, we still do not know why this town has been sustaining so many casualties from repeated hollow attacks. Reiatsu readouts have been normal, I can find no sign of anyone attempting to call them. And yet, there have been several attacks, even while we have been here."

"Yeah, it's weird," Renji agreed, "and I have no better idea than you why."

"We will go into town again and continue our efforts tomorrow," the noble suggested, sliding the expensive decoration out of his hair and removing his haori, gloves and shihakushou, so that he was left wearing only his white dressing yukata.

Renji turned away and first, invoked use of his kido to make a pot of tea that he poured out into two cups, then undressed and laid out their bedding. They sat quietly, side-by-side, sipping at their tea and listening to the rain falling. The colder air and the blazing tea collided, making little puffs of steam that escaped their noses and mouths as they breathed.

"So, tell me again why we didn't take a room at the inn in town, Taichou?" Renji said, shaking his head, "We'd at least be a little warmer. And any hot food tastes good on a night like this."

"That is true," Byakuya admitted, "but there was something about that place that did not sit well with me."

"I take it you're not just referring to it's lack of creature comforts," Renji chuckled.

"No," the noble agreed, "There was something off about the people there...not just the innkeeper and staff, but some of the guests in the lobby and restaurant as well. It made me think there is more to what is going on here than was reported to the unit that received the original report."

"So that's why you used the stronger barrier too?"

"Yes."

Byakuya finished the last of his tea and nodded appreciatively.

"That was exceptionally good," he commented, "Did you use something different in it?"

"Actually, yeah," the redhead confessed, "There was this little tea shop by the inn that I stopped in while I was checking out the vendor areas. It's one of the shopkeeper's herbal blends. It's supposed to be good for relaxing and sleeping well."

"I see. Well, it does seem quite soothing."

"I bought a couple of others for us to try," Renji went on, "And I bought one for my buddy, Shuuhei. Did I tell you he's getting married?"

"No, you hadn't mentioned it as of yet," the noble said, lying down and watching with sleepy eyes as the redhead extinguished the kido lamp and laid down on the mat next to his.

"Yeah," Renji said, yawning, "He and Kira finally confessed their feelings for each other. I mean, the rest of us who hang out with them have been on them to just say it, but those two are impossible. Each was too shy to admit it in front of the other. But I guess after almost losing each other in the war with the quincies, they just knew they had to say it."

The redhead chuckled, remembering.

"I don't think those two will ever stop blushing, especially after they open the gifts at their bachelor party this weekend. Ikkaku, Yumichika and I schemed with some of our friends to include some gag gifts among the others. Yumi got them some lacy lingerie and Ikkaku hired a male stripper. I have a few things also, including another tea that old vendor had that he says can help anyone get pregnant, even a couple of guys!"

"Abarai, you know that..."

"Yeah, I know it probably doesn't really do that, but the packet was a hoot to read. It'll make them laugh."

"It sounds like it will be a jovial gathering. Will you need a day off to recover, then?" Byakuya asked, giving the redhead a slightly amused look and shaking his head.

"Yeah, probably," Renji laughed, "Things do get a little crazy when we have a party."

Renji yawned again and closed his eyes, "So, are you doing something special this weekend, Taichou? When I dropped by the manor to bring you those reports yesterday, it seemed like a lot was going on."

"Hmmm," Byakuya sighed, blinking sleepily, "You could say that. The elders have made an agreement for me to wed the daughter of another clan leader. We are announcing our engagement this weekend."

"What?" Renji asked, sitting up and staring down at the noble, "Taichou, you're getting married? Just like that? Do you even know this girl? Do you like her?"

"She is a bit younger than I would like, but she is of age for marriage, and she is a well bred young woman."

"But...do you have feelings for her?"

"Not any serious ones," the noble sighed, "I didn't wish to remarry at all, but the quincies, while not winning the war, did nearly reach their goal of destroying the noble families. Our clan was spared, as Tetsuya had plans in place and had conducted drills to train our subfamilies what to do in case of the outbreak of hostilities. But most of the other clans were not so lucky. Many women and children were killed. So now, the elders that remain are arranging marriages to stimulate a regrowth of our population."

"It is awful what happened to the clans," the redhead agreed, "Thank goodness for your family having Tetsuya. He's really smart."

"Yes."

"And I'll bet those old farts aren't so down on him about being a half blood now, ne?"

"Not anymore," Byakuya agreed, the corners of his mouth turning upward, "They have finally begun to see that young man's true value. We have received several offers from other clans for his hand, actually."

Renji gave his taichou a knowing smirk.

"Well, I know a certain clan heir who's had his eye on your cousin, Taichou."

"Oh, don't even..."

Renji laughed.

"Come on, Taichou. I know you've noticed how Ichigo looks at him."

"He seems to have Tetsuya cornered nearly every time he visits the manor," Byakuya sighed, "But it is good to see Tetsuya happy. Like me, he lost a lover a long time ago, and he has not been in love with anyone since. So, I suppose if Ichigo has serious intentions about Tetsuya, I will not impede them."

"Good," sighed the redhead, "Cause, I'll confess. Ichigo asked me to feel you out about the two of them. Tetsuya didn't want to go against you if you disapproved, but he really likes Ichigo a lot. And hey, you know ol' fleabag gives Ichigo hell every time those two try to go on a date. It's funny as heck. That should make you happy. I thought I was the only one that horse didn't like."

"Arashi doesn't dislike you," Byakuya corrected him, "He just enjoys teasing you. And it does amuse me somewhat that he puts that upstart in his place, now and again."

"Heh, stop it, Taichou. You can't fool me. I know you don't dislike Ichigo. I think you just like teasing him as much as Arashi does."

"Sometimes," the noble admitted, smirking, "He has a tendency to be cocky. He is a gifted fighter and a true friend, but sometimes, yes, he is rather annoying."

"But getting back to you and this girl," Renji went on, "Do you really have to marry her?"

"I suppose I could refuse, but I see the sense of assisting in the restoration of the clans. And if I must marry, I suppose it should be something that will bring about some good. She is not unhappy about the arrangement and even not being in love with her, I will treat her honorably. And I must confess, I do regret not having been able to have a child with Hisana."

"Huh," Renji mused, frowning and lying back down, "I'll never understand getting married if you're not in love. But if you and this girl are okay with it, I guess it should be all right. I just think it's kinda sad that you aren't marrying for love."

"I already married for love once," Byakuya said, more softly, "I married for love against the wishes of the elders, and that love ended in disaster. I am comfortable with this."

"Well, not wanting to make you mad or anything, forgive me if I secretly hope you and that noble lady end up falling in love," Renji said, shaking his head.

"One never knows, I suppose," Byakuya mused softly.

"Yeah," Renji agreed, his mind drifting as he edged towards sleep.

The two went quiet, listening to the sounds of the rain and occasional bouts of thunder as they slowly surrendered to sleep.

For several hours, the two slept within the protective barrier, their bodies relaxed and calm, each perfectly at ease in the company of the other, having spent many nights in close proximity to one another, watching over each other protectively. But as the full moon rose, hidden outside by the clouds above them, their two bodies began to glow softly in the darkness, then to pulsate gently.

A pair of wide grey eyes opened in the darkness, and was met with the redhead's cinnamon brown colored ones. They gazed at each other senselessly for several long moments, then Byakuya's pale hand reached out and cupped around the redhead's cheek, coaxing him into a warm, sweet, tea-flavored kiss. Renji gave a little sigh and lifted himself, crawling closer to the other man and parting his lips as Byakuya's tongue teased them playfully.

The noble's tongue dipped into Renji's yielded orifice, tasting the fiery surfaces and savoring him slowly. Renji's hand found the drawstrings on their yukatas and pulled them free. Their clothing fell away into a soft heap around them as the noble sat up and wrapped his arms around his fukutaichou. They kissed again, more forcibly, letting searching hands and fingers explore each other amorously. A low rumble of thunder seemed to ignite their growing passion, and Renji looped an arm around his lovely taichou's back, lowering him again, then parting his unresisting, petal-soft thighs and positioning himself between them.

Renji's deeply hazed eyes watched raptly as the fingers he used to prepare the noble caused Byakuya to moan and thrash heatedly in response. He couldn't remember ever seeing his stoic, straight-laced taichou do anything so unbelievably beautiful and erotic, and he watched with entranced eyes and Byakuya panted and raised his hips wantonly, biting at his lips impatiently as his subordinate completed his preparations, then moved forward to mount his superior officer.

He almost climaxed, then and there, as he finally penetrated the spellbound noble, making him cry out in a mixture of pain and ecstasy. His body reared up against the redhead's and began to grind shamelessly against his, and that lovely mouth opened again into heated exclamations of desire. Renji responded with a flurry of heavy, pounding thrusts. holding onto Byakuya's slender body and barely able to catch a breath as the pleasure rose within them. He felt himself begin to peak and froze in place, holding himself still as he was overtaken. He gasped in surprise as Byakuya suddenly turned and overthrew him, taking him down onto his belly and preparing him hastily, before plunging deeply into the redhead's undulating body and exacting tantalizing revenge. Renji's mouth opened into a howls of intense pleasure, that rose into a blinding scream as Byakuya shuddered sweetly and his blazing release filled his subordinate's shaking body.

The two collapsed, indulging in a thrill of deep, wet kisses, then fell still and drifted back into a deep, dreamless sleep.

The two slept soundly, well into the next morning, when Byakuya finally stirred and started to come awake. He caught his breath in surprise at finding the two of them naked and entangled with each other. He made a sound of distress and sat up, rousing the sleepy redhead and evoking a gasp from his stunned subordinate. The two gazed wonderingly at each other and pondered what to say.

"M-my apologies," Byakuya said finally, a blush overtaking his comely face, "It seems I've been less than a gentleman with you."

Renji looked down at their plundered bodies and found himself laughing softly.

"I don't think I was such a gentleman either," he said, shaking his head, "What the heck..."

"I wonder what came over us."

"You'd think we'd had a love potion or something..."

The two went quiet for a moment, then their eyes met again questioningly. Renji turned and scrambled towards the pack that held the tea he had bought, and he dug around for a moment, before withdrawing the opened packet he had used the night before.

"Oh my kami!" he laughed, "Oh, gods, I'm so sorry, Taichou! I mixed up the packets and gave us the one I got for Shuuhei and Kira!"

He descended into a fit of giggles as Byakuya looked on disapprovingly.

"Oh my god, Taichou!" he laughed, "We'd better hope that stuff doesn't really work or we're going to be having each other's babies! Have fun trying to get married to that girl when that happens."

"Really Abarai," Byakuya sighed, rolling his eyes, "Stop that and get dressed. This is really disgraceful. Do you have any idea how the elders would react, knowing I bedded my fukutaichou only a day before announcing my engagement? I think they would assassinate me, then and there."

"Aw, I wouldn't let them to that, Taichou. I won't let anyone hurt the mother of my little bastard kid!"

"Would you please desist,?" Byakuya said in an annoyed tone as the redhead laughed harder, until tears began to run down his face.

"S-sorry, Taichou," Renji snickered, "It's just been forever since I even had sex, and to think I had my first sex with a guy, and it was my taichou, probably the most gorgeous guy in the Seireitei, and we don't even remember anything!"

"That's terrible!" snapped the noble.

Then, he paused.

"Renji...what did you say?"

Renji stopped laughing and regarded Byakuya more seriously, but still with a gentle twinkle in his eye.

"I said you're beautiful, Taichou," he repeated, "Probably the most beautiful shinigami in the Seireitei. And it's true."

"Renji..."

"Don't worry," Renji laughed, "I know you're not interested in me that way. I just think it's funny, you know?"

"I am pleased at least one of us is amused," the noble said dryly, "Will you get up and get dressed now, Abarai? We do still have a mission to see to. And bring the rest of that tea. We'll want it to be checked out when we return home to make sure it will have no worrisome effects."

"You don't really think we'll get pregnant, do you, Taichou?"

"No. But you never know what other annoyances such a thing might cause."

"Look, I'm really sorry I mixed up the tea packets. I hope you're not mad."

"No. I am sure it's fine," the noble assured him, "Just let's put it out of our heads. We have other things to worry about."

"Sure thing, Taichou," the redhead answered cheerfully, moving to begin packing their things.

Byakuya observed him for a moment, then moved to join him.

_There is never a dull moment with this man, the noble mused inwardly, Choosing him was one of the best decisions I have ever made. If my own spirits must be quelled for the sake of my family's honor, then at least I can watch a man who embraces life so fearlessly._

_I wish I could be like that._

_But losing Hisana made me far too cautious to take a risk like falling in love._

_No, I will never fall in love again._

_Never._


	2. Dawning

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Renji's friends realize that something is not right with him, while nearby, Byakuya prepares to enter a marriage of convenience.

(one month later)

"Hey, Renji," Hisagi Shuuhei called out, smiling as he entered the sixth division headquarters, followed by a slightly blushing Izuru Kira, "We heard your taichou was out and wondered if you wanted to join us for lunch. We have some details for the ceremony we need to go over and thought this would be a good time to catch you, you being our best man and all."

"Yeah, Taichou's off getting married and things are pretty slow," Renji answered, setting down the papers he had been looking over, "I'll go, but I don't know how much eating I'll do. My stomach's been kinda queasy the last few days."

"Oh, sorry to hear that," said Kira, "So, you think you're coming down with something?"

"You hardly ever get sick," Shuuhei noted.

"Mostly I don't," Renji agreed, "but it may be something going around because Taichou was feeling the same way, though we thought it might just be the stress of his wedding preparations. I don't know. I feel okay now. As a matter of fact, I'm pretty damned hungry."

"Then, we should get lunch before you start feeling crappy again," Shuuhei suggested.

"Good call," Renji chuckled, sliding his chair out and standing.

A moment later, a discomfited look crossed his face and he swayed unsteadily.

"Whoa!" Kira said in a concerned tone, catching the redhead and holding him for a moment.

"Hey, Red, are you all right?" Shuuhei asked quickly, laying a hand on his arm.

"I'm fine," Renji laughed, good naturedly, "I just got up too fast. My head spun for a minute, but it's okay now. C'mon. we have a fukutaichou's meeting later, so we want to get moving."

"Well," Kira said, frowning, "if you're sure you're okay."

"I told you I'm fine," Renji chuckled, shaking his head, "Let's go."

The three men left the sixth division and started down the street together.

"So, what's the story with Kuchiki taichou?" Kira asked curiously, "There's a rumor going about that he's not really so happy about this wedding."

"Oh, he's all right with it," Renji replied with certainty, "Although, it is an arranged marriage. But you've said it yourself, Kira. Many clan leaders and heirs enter arranged marriages. Taichou's okay with that. I'm sure he'll be a good husband."

"Well, I'm glad I come from a lower noble house," Kira sighed, "I don't think I could do what Kuchiki taichou's doing. Having to be married to someone I don't love? Making babies with them?"

"Well, Taichou said to me that he's actually looking forward to the baby thing."

"Heh," Shuuhei chuckled, smirking, "Just be glad that tea you mixed up didn't make you both pregnant or you'd both be marrying someone you didn't want to and having babies."

"Hey, shut up, baka!" Renji scolded him, "I don't want people to know about that. It would embarrass Taichou. I only told you because I figured I could trust you to keep it between us."

"I won't tell anyone. Don't worry," Shuuhei promised.

"Neither will I," Kira added.

"Besides," Renji went on, "Honestly, I just wish someone that beautiful was marrying and making babies with me, you know? It'd be way better than the lack of a love life I have now. And Taichou's really good to people who are close to him. He and Tetsuya and Rukia are all real close-knit now. And he's been especially great to me since the war ended."

"Aww, sounds like Ren-chan has a crush," Shuuhei teased.

"Fuck you, I do not!" Renji laughed, swatting at his friend, "I can think he's beautiful without it being a crush. I just wish I remembered more of our night together, you know? What I've remembered since then is pretty sexy, but I'd kill to know all of what happened."

"Does Kuchiki taichou remember more now?" Kira asked.

"I don't know. He said to put it out of our heads, and he seems like he's done that. But he was really flustered about the whole thing, as opposed to me, the guy who hadn't had sex for a long time before and hasn't had sex since. Oh well, it was worth it...one of the best stupid mistakes I've ever made."

"Aww, now you're making us jealous," laughed Shuuhei.

"Yeah, well don't be," Renji chided him, "because that once I was with him will be the only time ever. I'm beginning to wonder if I'll ever have sex with anyone again."

"Damn, you sound like you need a drink."

"I would if my freaking stomach wasn't so iffy," Renji complained,

"Huh, Renji's not drinking?" Kira said teasingly, "I think the world's coming to an end."

"Eh, shut up..."

The three continued their lively banters as they reached the noodle shop they had chosen for their meal and got in line to make their selections. They sat down with their food and moved on to a discussion of Kira and Shuuhei's upcoming wedding, then fell back into more casual talk again.

At first, Renji's stomach growled noisily, and he couldn't get enough of the delicious noodles and chicken. But as he finished and moved on to dessert, the queasy feeling returned, and the redhead abandoned the sweets in front of him. Kira noted his look of discomfort and frowned.

"You really aren't so good today," he commented, "Usually, you eat all that and extra dessert."

"I know," Renji sighed, "It's a pain in the ass. I'm hungry, but I feel like I'm gonna puke if I eat anymore."

"Maybe you should get checked out at the fourth," Kira suggested.

"Maybe you should have'em give you a pregnancy test," Shuuhei laughed, "You said your taichou was sick too. Maybe he should have one. Do you have any more of that tea, Renji?"

"Shut up!" Renji snapped, "And no, I don't. I lost it in the fight we had in the lower Rukon, just before we came home. And the old guy and tea stand were gone after. Never could find the guy again, actually. Anyway, it doesn't matter. It was just a gag. So, knock it off and don't talk about it anymore. Someone might hear."

"Sorry, I was just kidding around," Shuuhei said penitently, "But seriously, you should go to the fourth."

"I told you knuckleheads I'm fine," the redhead insisted, standing.

Instantly, he began to sway and his red-brown eyes glazed over.

"Renji!" his friends called out, catching the redhead as he collapsed.

"What do we do?" exclaimed Kira.

"Come on," said Shuuhei, lifting the unconscious redhead, "We'll take him to the fourth and have him looked at."

XXXXXXXXXX

"It's just about time," Tetsuya said, stepping into the dressing area, where Torio stood, putting the finishing touches on the clan leader's wedding kimono and hair.

Tetsuya paused, gazing appreciatively at his cousin, then sighed softly.

"You look wonderful, watashi no itoko."

"Thank you," Byakuya said calmly, "Torio, will you please excuse us."

"Of course, sir."

Byakuya watched as the attendant left, leaving him alone in the dressing area with a curious Tetsuya.

"Why did you do that?" the younger noble asked.

"I wanted a moment to speak to you," Byakuya said solemnly, "I have been meaning to for some time, but given the military issues in the Rukongai and the wedding preparations, I hadn't the chance. I really should have spoken to you about this long ago."

"Oh," Tetsuya said, blushing slightly, "Are you talking about Shiba Ichigo? I..."

"Don't worry, Cousin," Byakuya said, interrupting him gently, "I have no objection to you seeing Shiba Ichigo romantically."

Tetsuya blinked at him in surprise.

"Y-you don't?" he asked softly.

"No. As a matter of fact, I find it heartening that after what you endured, you are courageous enough to fall in love again. I will never be that brave, Tetsuya."

"Byakuya-sama..."

"It is all right, Tetsuya. It's fine for me to admit that I no longer desire anyone that way. I am all right being married with the intent of gifting our clan with new life and rebuilding what was lost in the war. Those are admirable things too."

"Of course they are," Tetsuya agreed, "But maybe you don't have to go without love, Byakuya-sama. Maybe with time..."

"No," Byakuya said, even more softly, "I will confide in you that recently my will was tested. Someone seemed to be slipping into my heart, but I resisted the feeling and I am fine with no longer pursuing that dream. I will, instead, do what is best for the clan. I will marry Aomori Ami and I will do my best to be a good husband to her, and father to our children. For me, it is better this way. Like you, I have faced great losses already. But unlike you, I haven't the heart to take on more. I'll let my heart be thus protected and at the same time will be happy knowing that you have found someone you love. Being near to that will be a comfort."

"Even if the man I love is Shiba Ichigo?" Tetsuya asked, smirking.

Then, his comely face took on a more serious look.

"Please, Byakuya-sama, don't close your heart. Even if you and Ami are only friends now, you may grow into love. It took a very long time for me to be able to love again. That time will come again for you. I just know it will. Please Cousin, don't give up on love."

Byakuya closed his eyes and let out a soft breath, enfolding Tetsuya in his arms and holding him tightly for a moment.

"Tetsuya," he sighed, "You are ever and always a great comfort to me."

He released his cousin and leaned forward to kiss him gently on one cheek and then the other.

"You and Ichigo have my blessing to see each other romantically, and, when the time comes, to marry, if that is your wish."

Tetsuya smiled helplessly, returning the affectionate kisses he had received, then stepping back.

Byakuya took a steadying breath as the doors opened and Torio returned, along with Rukia.

"It's time, Nii-sama," Rukia said, her eyes tearing slightly.

"Very well," the clan leader said, much more calmly than he felt, "Let us go."

He left the room, walking quietly between Rukia and Tetsuya, then joining hands with them to be led up the aisle to where he would wait for his bride. As they reached the front of the gathering, Tetsuya an Rukia each kissed him on the cheek, then moved aside, leaving Byakuya at the head of the aisle, alongside the head elder of the Kuchiki council.

Byakuya watched with unreadable eyes as a beautifully dressed and veiled young woman was led to the beginning of the aisle, where she paused and waited at her father's side. The wedding march began and the attendees stood and turned to watch as Ami was led up the aisle. Byakuya couldn't help but notice the slight tremor in her step and her smile as she moved forward. But she walked bravely to where he waited and although she must, he thought, be very anxious, stood perfectly still and accepted a kiss on the cheek from her father.

He saw it as they parted...the flash of regret at what was happening.

_He is a father who, although he is noble, wants what is best for his daughter. And he must go against that now and watch her be married to a man whom she does not love, and one who will never love her in return. And Ami is no less dutiful. Although she is young and likely longs to be loved, she knows I do not love her. I think that she hopes I will someday, but I am only going to disappoint her in that._

_My heart aches at taking away her future. As much as it is accepted that this is normal for our kind, it feels so unnatural. But we bear it bravely because we must._

Byakuya extended a hand and Ami gently accepted it and moved forward to join him in front of Kuchiki Nori.

"Dearly beloved," the head councilor began, "We have come here today to witness the joining of Kuchiki Byakuya and Aomori Ami in the bonds of holy matrimony. Love is a great thing...and the love that these two have for their noble families has caused them to seek this union, to best serve their needs. Blessed are all those selfless enough to serve their clans in such a way."

_I do not think either of us feels blessed, Byakuya thought as Nori continued, We go through the motions and we will call this a marriage, but I know from having been married that this is a travesty. It is an insult to the kind of love that I knew with Hisana._

His mind drifted back to a cold, rainy night some weeks before, and the red haired man with whom he had shared very sudden and unplanned lovemaking. He remembered too how slowly, over time, what had happened between them had returned, and had sweetly tormented him as he had prepared to take Ami's hand.

_I would have to have been blind not to realize, of course. I was moving closer and closer to Renji, ever since we fought over Rukia and his sword first reached me. It began as respect and grew into friendship and mentoring. But that night, for only that night, I saw Renji differently. For just that moment, I saw that there could be love again, even after all of the losses I have faced. Being with Renji that night was beautiful, though at first, I didn't remember any of it at all._

_I cannot decide if it is a blessing or a curse that the memories returned._

_Renji is as beautiful as a lover as he is on the battlefield. If ever I could have dared to love again, I might have loved him. But that window of opportunity is closed now. It is probably better this way. Perhaps he would have rejected me anyway._

He suffered a flash memory that made a lie of the words.

_"Renji...what did you say?"_

_Renji stopped laughing and regarded Byakuya more seriously, but still with a gentle twinkle in his eye._

_"I said you're beautiful, Taichou," he repeated, "Probably the most beautiful shinigami in the Seireitei. And it's true."_

_"Renji..."_

_"Don't worry," Renji laughed, "I know you're not interested in me that way. I just think it's funny, you know?"_

Byakuya sucked in a steadying breath and refocused on the head councilor, but his errant thoughts managed to persist.

_Renji said that he was aware I was not interested in him that way, but...he said that I was beautiful...and he did not say he wasn't interested in me._

"Do you, Aomori Ami, take Kuchiki Byakuya to be your lawfully wedded husband? Will you, forsaking all others, bind yourself to only him...love, honor and obey him for better or for worse, for richer or for poorer, in sickness and in health, for all the days of your lives?"

Ami's hand quivered very slightly where it held his and her voice trembled as she answered.

"I will."

"And do you, Kuchiki Byakuya, take Aomori Ami to be your lawfully wedded wife?" Nori went on.

Byakuya's heart quickened and he felt a twinge of discomfort in his abdomen.

"Will you, forsaking all others, bind yourself only to her...love, honor and cherish her for better or for worse..."

Byakuya's heart pounded harder.

"For richer or for poorer..."

Dizziness swept over him and he felt sweat break out on his forehead. He heard Ami make a soft sound of concern.

"...in sickness and in health, for all the days of your lives?"

"B-byakuya-sama?" Ami whispered, "Byakuya-sama, are you all right?"

Byakuya tried to answer, but couldn't make his lips move. His ears rang like firebells and around him, the air seemed to dim until everything disappeared into a haze of deep grey, and he heard sounds of dismay as his legs gave way beneath him and he started to fall.


	3. Small Miracles

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Byakuya and Renji receive stunning news from their healers!

Tetsuya laid his cousin carefully on his bed, glancing over his shoulder briefly as Byakuya's personal attendant followed him into the bedroom and closed the garden doors.

"Tetsuya-san," Torio said urgently, "I have notified the clan healer and he is on his way."

"Arigatou, Torio," Tetsuya answered, leaning over their unconscious leader and scanning his reiatsu and body briefly.

He paused, frowning uncertainly as Byakuya's body began a soft pulsation and a gentle pink glow rose around him.

"What is that light?" Torio asked, looking alarmed, "What is happening, Tetsuya-san?"

"I don't know," Tetsuya admitted, "My knowledge of healing is exceptional, but I have not seen this before. Still, Michio-san is more knowledgeable than me. Perhaps he will know. It does not feel dangerous, and our cousin does not seem to be in distress, but...it is very odd. His reiatsu does seem a little off. I will give him an infusion while we wait for the healer."

Tetsuya touched his palms to the unconscious clan leader's midsection, just over his core spirit center, then paused, his frown deepening.

"Tetsuya-san?" Torio queried worriedly, "What is it?"

"I'm not sure."

The two looked up as an aged shinigami with silver hair and kind brown eyes entered the bedroom.

"Michio-san," Tetsuya said quickly, "I am glad you are here. Thank you for coming so quickly."

"What's all the fuss, Tetsuya-san?" the clan healer asked, "I heard that Byakuya-sama collapsed during the wedding."

"Hai," Tetsuya confirmed, "He seemed paler than usual before, maybe a bit uncomfortable, but we thought it might just be nerves, due to the impending wedding."

"Ah, likely the wedding, plus everything else the poor lad has to attend to all at once. I wouldn't be surprised if he was plain exhausted, given all he has to do in a day. But let's have a look, ne?"

The healer moved to Byakuya's side and examined him quietly as Tetsuya and Torio looked on.

"He doesn't appear to have any physical injuries," Michio said calmly, "And I agree with you, Tetsuya-san, that his reiatsu does seem off."

"I sensed some kind of small...disruption or interference of some sort in the area of his core spirit center," Tetsuya reported, "The reiatsu began glowing and pulsating, as you see it is now."

"Hmmm, very odd," the healer whispered, looking more closely and watching the pulsation carefully, "It...almost has that feel of a...a calling of some kind."

"A signal?" Tetsuya proposed curiously, "Do you think...?"

"Tetsuya-san," said a second attendant, from the bedroom doorway.

"What is it, Koji?"

"Word just came from the fourth division, that Abarai fukutaichou was admitted within the last half hour."

"What?" Tetsuya queried.

"They say that he was with friends and that he simply collapsed and is unconscious. I relayed to them that our leader has collapsed as well, and they are sending a healer to examine him to see if the two are related. They are also quarantining the sixth division to make sure that if it is a contagious illness, no more people are exposed. Sir, we have also been quarantined...all of our household and everyone at the wedding!"

"Sweet kami!" Tetsuya exclaimed, rising.

"Ah," the old healer said, shaking his head gently, "Tetsuya-san, you should go and see to the comfort of our unintended guests. I have things in hand here and will send Torio-san if there are any changes in Byakuya-sama's condition."

"Arigatou!" Tetsuya said hastily, flash stepping out the door.

XXXXXXXXXX

"Is Renji-san going to be all right?" Shuuhei asked worriedly, looking down at his unconscious friend, "He hasn't moved since he passed out."

"Oh, I think he'll be fine," Hanatarou said reassuringly, "He isn't in any great distress. Whatever this is, the unconsciousness and the reiatsu oddities do not seem to be dangerous, in and of themselves."

He paused as a messenger dashed into the treatment room.

"Hanatarou-kun, we have received word back from Kuchiki Manor!" the young man exclaimed, "Sir, Kuchiki taichou has also collapsed!"

"What? Really?" Hanatarou answered, shaking his head worriedly.

"Kotetsu fukutaichou ordered a quarantine for the sixth division, Kuchiki Manor, and anyone who has had direct contact with Abarai Renji or Kuchiki taichou, including all medical staff."

"Holy smokes!" the young healer gasped, reaching for a surgical mask, then handing them out to the others in the room.

"Kotetsu fukutaichou said to tell you that Kuchiki taichou is being transported and will arrive shortly. Medical personnel have already been prepared and sent to both the sixth division and Kuchiki Manor to examine everyone who might have had contact with these two."

"Wow, what a mess!" Hanatarou sighed, turning back to Renji to continue his examination.

"But you say he'll be okay, you think?" asked Kira.

"I think he'll be fine," Hanatarou replied, "But since you were with him, I'll need to examine you as well. And I have a few questions."

"Sure, no problem," Shuuhei said, nodding, "What do you need to know?"

"Ah, you said that Renji-san seemed uncomfortable and complained about his stomach before you ate, ne?"

"Yeah, he did seem kinda off," Shuuhei confirmed.

"Now, did he mention having done anything that might have exposed him to a contagion or been around anyone who was sick also? Or did he have contact with someone, you know...did he have business with someone he usually didn't? Did he have physical relations with anyone within the last two to four weeks who might have exposed him?"

Kira's breath caught, and he exchanged anxious glances with Shuuhei.

"What is it?" Hanatarou asked, "Did you two remember something?"

"Um..." Kira stammered uncertainly.

Shuuhei bit his lip gently and frowned.

"I think, for Renji-san's sake, we have to tell him," he told Kira quietly, "Hanatarou-kun, Renji said that the only person he ever had sex with was Kuchiki taichou. They were on a mission in the Rukongai about a month ago and Renji bought this...erm...herbal tea from a tea merchant. He said it was a gag gift that he was going to give me and Kira for our wedding. It said on the package that it could even get a guy pregnant. Funny, huh? But he mixed it up with their tea and they drank it. That night, they uh, they went into some sort of trance and had sex. They woke in the morning and realized what they'd done, but they didn't think anything of it, because neither of them felt sick."

"Y-you don't think that the tea actually worked, do you?" Kira asked, shaking his head.

"I don't know," Hanatarou confessed as a second patient was wheeled into the room, "But I think we are about to find out."

"Hanatarou-kun, what is Abarai fukutaichou's condition?" Isane asked hastily, as she leaned over Byakuya and examined him.

"He is still unconscious, but he is stable," Hanatarou reported, "But there's something you should know about his medical history."

"Oh?"

"About a month ago, he and Kuchiki taichou mistakenly ingested some tea Renji bought as a gag gift for a wedding. The tea was supposed to cause pregnancy. It did cause them to enter a trance of some kind and they had sexual intercourse, but neither one was ill after, so they didn't think it was a dangerous thing."

"Do we have the packaging or samples of the tea?" Isane asked.

Hanatarou glanced at Kira.

"No," Kira answered shaking his head, "Renji said that the package was destroyed in the fighting on their mission, and when he went back to find the merchant, the guy was gone."

"Do we have any other tea that Abarai fukutaichou purchased from the merchant? Any at all?" Isane asked more stridently.

"I don't know," answered Shuuhei, "It they did have more, it would be in the sixth division headquarters, in the kitchen. Do you want me to go look?"

"No, sorry," replied Isane, "We are still all under quarantine. But we may lift it, if it turns out this is related to the tea and is not a contagion."

"So, what do think?" asked Shuuhei, "Do you think that pregnancy tea actually worked?"

"But how could that be?" Kira exclaimed, "Can guys really even get pregnant? How...?"

"Hmmm," Isane said, leaning over Byakuya and touching a palm to his midsection for several minutes, then moving to Renji's side and doing the same.

"The pulsation in Byakuya-sama has intensified since we entered the room," added Michio, "When I spoke to Tetsuya-san, who examined him before I did, he said that it struck him as being like a signal of some kind."

"A signal?" Hanatarou repeated.

"Huh..." Isane mused, looking from one man to the other.

"What are you thinking, Kotetsu-chan?" asked Michio.

"This is one of those times when I really miss Unohana taichou," Isane sighed somberly, "It's so confusing. But I do sense something in each, just behind the core spirit center."

"I sensed this also in Byakuya-sama before," reported Michio, "and Tetsuya-san said the same...that there was a disturbance of some kind in the area."

"Yes," Isane agreed, "I'm not sure what it is. But if it is related to that tea, then we could be looking at a kind of pregnancy."

"What?" Kira and Shuuhei exclaimed, staring at their unconscious friend in dismay, "Renji and Kuchiki taichou are...?!"

"I'm not sure yet," Isane said firmly, "I only said that it's possible, but...I wonder why the reiatsu anomaly and pulsation are present. Tetsuya-san said it felt like a signal."

She looked from Byakuya's gently pulsating body to Renji's and back again.

"And the stongest form of pulsation between souls is a resonance."

"A resonance," Michio repeated wonderingly.

"Y-yeah," the stunned healer agreed numbly, "I think maybe that tea was something like this resonance elixir that I learned about during my early training. It is a compound that some of the noble clans in old times, hundreds of years ago, used to match up their heirs for marriage. It was banned as a practice long ago...not because the compound was dangerous, but because Central 46 disapproved of it, because they couldn't establish exactly how it worked, and some worried that it would have bed effects later, although there was never a report of anyone given the compound that was actually negatively affected. Still, the compound did mark resonances, and apparently, Kuchiki taichou and Abarai fukutaichou resonated strongly enough to be affected by it...well, if that's what this is."

"But how do we find out for sure?" Shuuhei asked, still looking alarmed.

"Well," Isane went on, "I was told that once resonance was established and the pair had intercourse, the one who...erm...was...um...well..."

"The one who received the seed," Michio supplied, giving her an amused smile.

"Ah, right," the lady healer agreed, blushing, "Yes, the one who received seed would form a spirit chamber that would hold and mature the reiatsu of a noble child. It progressed for six to eight months and was similar to female pregnancy, except..."

"But how does the baby get out?" Kira asked, looking spooked, "Renji-san won't...!"

"Oh, no!" Isane assured him, "The baby stays in reiatsu form until the birth. I'm not sure how it happens, but the abdominal wall loses its cohesion, allowing the reiatsu cluster to pass through. Then, the cluster solidifies."

"And...this has actually worked?" Shuuhei asked in a concerned tone, "Guys have given birth like that?"

"Well, not for hundreds of years it hasn't happened," Isane said, shaking her head.

"But it is documented in our histories," affirmed Michio, "so it is possible that this is what is affecting them. And if it is, then this pulsation is a signal of sorts."

"A signal?" repeated Kira.

Isane and Michio moved Byakuya's bed closer to Renji's, then the old clan healer captured Byakuya's hand and laid it gently in Renji's. As the stunned healers and the two other fukutaichous looked on wonderingly, the glow between the two men brightened and the pulsation slowed and became more tranquil.

"Ah!" Michio sighed, "This is the balancing!"

"The balancing?" Isane breathed, "You mean...?"

"The disturbance that Tetsuya-san and I detected in our leader was a sign of the need for balancing the maturing reiatsu, something that must be done by the mate of the one giving birth. This was one of the reasons that the practice of that kind of resonance matching was banned. If one of the mates died before the delivery, the baby's reiatsu would destabilize...causing the bearer to hollowfy!"

The gathered shinigamis in the room looked, white-faced, from Byakuya to Renji and back again. Shuuhei cleared his throat softly and gazed curiously at the two healers.

"So...um, do we know which one uh...uh...?"

"Received seed?" Michio supplied, smiling tolerantly.

"Y-yeah," Shuuhei said, suppressing a smile, "Renji-san was sick to his stomach, so..."

"Actually," Michio said, leaning over Byakuya again, "it seems to me that both may have this chamber and a developing child. Don't you agree, Kotetsu-chan?"

Isnae moved to Renji's side and examined him carefully, then moved on to Byakuya and did the same. Then, she sighed and nodded.

"I sense the chamber in both of them," she confirmed.

For a moment, there was complete silence in the room and Shuuhei and Kira bit at their lips and blushed furiously.

"Sooo, it seems like Kuchiki taichou and Renji-san were...erm...equal partners?" Shuuhei concluded, causing his usually more somber friend to break into nervous laughter, which led Shuuhei to laugh as well.

"So it seems," Michio chuckled, "Ah, impetuous children..."

"So, what do we do for them?" Hanatarou asked suddenly, "Do we have to do anything?"

"Actually, they have to help each other," Michio explained, "They will need to obtain a medical leave, as they must be in physical proximity to each other so that if one needs balancing, they can offer it to each other immediately. And we should consider this a high risk pregnancy, as it is an unnatural method that we do not fully understand and haven't seen in hundreds of years, don't you agree, Kotetsu-san?"

"Yes, I would suggest that the two should be kept in close proximity all of the time until the babies are born. The balancing is going to be the key to a healthy birth."

The group went quiet again as Renji groaned and stirred, then Byakuya also began to wake. Their lips frowned questioningly and each man's head turned so that their eyes met for a moment, then traveled down to where their hands were joined.

"What is going on here?" Byakuya asked, looking mystified, "Why am I here, and why am I holding Renji's hand?"

The group in the room watched curiously as the glow around the two men faded. Byakuya sat up slowly, releasing Renji's hand and fixing his eyes on the clan healer.

"Michio? What is going on here?"

"Eh...what is going on here, the healer said, smiling, is that you and Abarai fukutaichou...are pregnant!"

Byakuya blinked in surprise, his dark eyes stunned and Renji's face went white, and the redhead collapsed back onto the bed.

"Oh, wow...I think he passed out," Hanatarou observed.

"W-we are...?" Byakuya began.

"Pregnant," the three healers and two friends said together.


	4. Close, But Barely Touching

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Byakuya and Renji adjust to their new situation.

"This is really unbelievable, Taichou," Renji mused, scratching the back of his neck and looking down at his normal-sized belly, "To think that we're really each going to have a baby. I know you're probably really pissed that I even bought, let alone mixed up those teas now. Sorry doesn't seem like enough, but I am very sorry sir."

"There was no way that you could know the tea would actually do what it said," Byakuya sighed, rubbing his aching abdomen gently, his dark eyes unusually softened, "Remember how easily I brushed the whole thing off?" he reminded the redhead, "If it comes to that, I am as guilty as you for not doing more to protect the sample of the tea after we ingested it. The important thing now is that we take care of ourselves and the new lives we carry in our bodies. That is...unless..."

"Unless what?"

Byakuya bit his lip gently and closed his eyes for a moment.

"Unless you do not feel you can go through with having your child."

"Huh...not go through with it?" Renji repeated, still not quite understanding.

Then, the meaning of the comment struck him.

"Oh! Oh, what the heck?" he managed in a flustered tone, "Of course I'll have the baby, Taichou! I mean, even if I made a mistake before, it's not the baby's fault, right? I'm not gonna take it out on the kid, just because I did something stupid and ended up pregnant."

Byakuya gave him a fleeting smile.

"I am of the same mind," he admitted, "but that being the case, I wonder if you will consider coming to stay at Kuchiki Manor for the duration of our gestation."

"What? Live at Kuchiki Manor?" Renji mused, thinking instantly of the beautiful gardens, good food, and the best part, more time with his taichou, "Really?"

"We have been told that we are going to need to be in close proximity, so that we can see to the necessary bonding. In fact, the babies will only survive if we are consistent about this bonding. So, it makes sense to put us in as close quarters as we can be."

"And as much as I like you, I just can't see you moving into my shitty little apartment," Renji laughed.

"It would be a little cramped, you'd have no attendants and there's only one bed, so we'd have to share," the redhead bantered on.

Then he realized, first what he had suggested and second, that Byakuya was blushing."

"I did not complain about your home, Renji," he said quietly, "I merely thought mine would be more comfortable."

"O-of course, sir!" Renji agreed hastily, inwardly kicking himself for seeming rude, "Sorry. You are right, too. I think Kuchiki Manor would be more comfortable. But are you sure that's okay with your elders? Won't they be pissed with you having a commoner like me...?"

"This is an unusual situation," Byakuya acknowledged, "But given that the elders' first consideration will, of course, be the well-being of the Kuchiki heirs, they will be accepting of this."

"Okay, if you're sure. Thanks, Taichou."

"And while you are my guest, you may have use of my architecture staff and whatever funds you need to either purchase and build a new home for you and the child you are bearing, or to arrange for a more comfortable living space for the two of you."

"Oh yeah, damn!" Renji chuckled, "I hadn't even had time to think of that. I'm still kind of wondering if the healers haven't made some huge mistake or something. I mean, I know I was nauseous and fainting before, but right now, for some reason, I just feel really, really happy."

"I noticed," Byakuya acknowledged, taking a closer look at his red-haired subordinate, "It is a little surprising, considering you are quite young and both sociable and popular among your peers. A baby is likely to impact your ability to socialize, especially once we are allowed to return to work."

"Yeah," Renji laughed, "And, you know, I haven't thought about that either. All I can keep thinking is that I'll have a little kid who's actually blood related to me. I'll be part of a family! I've never had that."

Byakuya felt a smile steal it's way onto his lips, and at the same time, it struck him how sad it was to think of Renji being alone in that way.

_I never knew my own mother, and my time with my father was short before he died. But, even then, I had my grandfather. Renji and Rukia had each other and their friends, but only Renji and Rukia survived._

The thought collided with the noble's heightened emotions, due to the pregnancy, and he felt tears rise in his eyes. Then, it occurred to him that Renji was watching him closely and not saying anything.

"My apologies," Byakuya said hastily.

"It's okay," Renji said, smiling at him, "I'm having moments like that too. Kotetsu fukutaichou said that we would be like that. I just didn't know how cute it would be, seeing you like that, Taichou."

Byakuya let out a flustered breath and looked away.

"Sorry, didn't mean to embarrass you," Renji apologized.

"It's fine. It's expected that the hormonal changes will have their way with us, and we will be more reactive sometimes."

"Well, then, you'd better have the staff ready for some explosions," Renji chuckled, "Because you know how hotheaded I already am."

"And I know your already tenuous ability to control your kido," Byakuya said dryly, prompting a giggle from the redhead that left his noble taichou inexplicably warmed inside.

_Renji is so easily accepting of this situation, Byakuya mused inwardly, He appreciates the notion of family, and seeing him so happy and desirous about having our child is..._

He wasn't sure there was a term to describe his feelings. But he admired the redhead's jovial demeanor as their conversation continued.

"I assure you that Kuchiki Manor will be well prepared for your stay. Now, I don't know about you, but I would like to be out of this place."

"You said it!" Renji agreed, wholeheartedly, "I don't know about you, but I think they too much enjoy jabbing us with needles. I feel sick just thinking about that."

Byakuya barely held back an amused smile as the redhead's face suddenly became discomfited and he dashed to the bathroom in their hospital room. He bit lightly at his lip, surprised at how much the redhead kept making him feel like smiling.

_He is certainly energetic and friendly complany. I think this arrangement could be pleasant for both of us._

"Are you all right now?" Byakuya asked as Renji exited the bathroom and rejoined him, "We can remain here longer if you need more time to recover."

"Are you kidding me, Taichou?" Renji said, shaking his head, "Let's get the hell out of here, please, before they're in here trying to get me with their needles again!"

"Really Abarai..." Byakuya sighed, heading for the door.

Renji laughed and fell in at his side as they left the room and reported to the front desk for their clearance to leave, then the two walked down the front steps and found Tetsuya standing nearby next to Arashi.

Renji smirked at the instant tension that rose in Byakuya's expression as they spotted Kurosaki Ichigo standing in front of the younger noble, smiling and laughing as the two talked.

"Those two..." the clan leader sighed.

"Aww, it's not so bad," Renji teased him, "They're kind of cute together, ne?"

"Shut up, Abarai."

"Right, Taichou," Renji chuckled, snickering as Tetsuya spotted his cousin and wished the shinigami substitute a hasty farewell, only to be snared and met with a more passionate kiss of parting from Ichigo.

"Ichigo, Tetsuya," Byakuya greeted them with forced politeness.

"I am g-glad to see you are feeling better, watashi no itoko," Tetsuya said, blushing furiously, "Can Arashi and I offer you and Renji a ride home?"

"Thank you, Tetsuya," Byakuya said quietly, motioning for Renji to mount the black Arabian stallion that stood just behind Tetsuya's shoulder.

Arashi turned a mischievous blue eye on the redhead and snorted.

"Ah, that's okay. I can walk."

"Nonsense," Byakuya said off-handedly, giving Renji his hand.

The redhead felt that cool, slender hand touch his and inexplicably felt a soft, beautiful jolt in his belly.

_Whoa...what's that about?_

He was distracted out of his thoughts as Byakuya's calm voice sounded again.

"Ichigo, will you join us for dinner tonight?" he asked solemnly.

Ichigo exchanged glances with a surprised and still slightly flustered looking Tetsuya.

"Yeah," Ichigo said, smiling at the younger noble's expression, "Sure. Thanks."

"The pleasure is mine," Byakuya said dryly, mounting behind Renji and sliding his arms around the redhead.

The stallion's first step unbalanced them slightly and Renji couldn't stifle a smile as the clan leader's arms tightened around him for a moment.

 _I wonder why that feels so good_ , he wondered as Arashi began walking alongside his shinigami master.

"So, are you here on business?" Byakuya asked Ichigo, sounding polite on the surface, but betraying the slightest edge of annoyance in his careful tone.

"Yeah, your Soutaichou asked me to help him out with something for a few days, so I'm going over to the hotel later and I'll stay there."

"There is no need for that," Byakuya sighed, "You are welcome to stay at the manor as our guest."

"Thanks," Ichigo answered, smirking at the less than enthusiastic offer, "That's nice of you. I accept!"

"I shall inform the staff to prepare a room for you."

"You sure I'm not imposing?" Ichigo asked in a more serious tone.

Byakuya observed him for a moment with a dark, meaningful eye.

"You have proven yourself to be both a benefactor and a friend, Ichigo. You are welcome in my home," Byakuya said more sincerely, "Just...remember to treat my cousin with the proper respect while you are with us."

Tetsuya sucked in a surprised breath and blushed more brightly, making Ichigo laugh as he slid his arm around the flustered noble.

"I would never disrespect Tetsuya, in your home or anywhere else," Ichigo answered firmly, "I love him."

"Ichigo!" Tetsuya exclaimed breathlessly.

Renji felt a flutter inside at the way a smile tugged at the corners of Byakuya's usually unsmiling mouth at Ichigo's words.

"It is good to see my cousin happy," the clan leader commented quietly.

"Thank you, Byakuya-sama," Tetsuya said, smiling and relaxing against Ichigo as they continued on towards the manor.

The smell of cooking food tickled Renji's senses, making the redhead's stomach growl noisily as they reached the manor gates and passed through. Byakuya stopped the stallion and slid down, then offered Renji a hand as he followed. Arashi flinched as the gate closed noisily behind them, making the redhead lose his balance and start to fall. He grasped at the horse, but missed, then felt himself caught up and steadied in strong arms.

"Are you all right, Renji?" Byakuya asked quickly.

Renji found his breath stolen away momentarily by the concern in the clan leader's voice.

"Ah, yeah, I'm fine, really Taichou. Thanks for catching me."

He smiled at the slight blush on his superior officer's face and extracted himself from Byakuya's protective embrace.

"Stupid fleabag horse," the redhead chuckled, swatting Arashi amiably on the rump as the stallion snorted derisively and trotted away.

"I am sorry about that, Renji-san," Tetsuya apologized, "He has terrible manners sometimes."

"Yes, you seem to attract that sort, don't you?" Byakuya muttered under his breath, exciting a muted snicker from Renji as Tetsuya and Ichigo continued on into the gardens.

"Hey Taichou, will you tell me something?"

"Hmmm?"

"Well, I can tell that Ichigo still kinda bugs you. So, why are you being so polite to him?"

Byakuya sighed.

_As much as I find his boldness and sometimes poor manners annoying, he did rescue my sister, and when I was injured in battle and sure that I was dying, he honored my final wish for him to protect what I could not. I owe him my respect, however much he may occasionally annoy me."_

The two watched as Ichigo slipped a hand into Tetsuya's and he leaned over to whisper something in the noble's ear that made Tetsuya smile more beautifully and lay his head on the shinigami substitute's shoulder.

"And besides," Byakuya went on, "I have never seen Tetsuya take to anyone like that. It is very important to me that Tetsuya should be happy. He had a difficult time before he came to Kuchiki Manor."

"That's really sweet, Taichou," Renji said, his mouth watering as more delicious cooking smells reached him.

Byakuya led Renji to a prepared table in the central gardens and the two sat down and were immediately served their tea and a few appetizers. Ichigo and Tetsuya returned from their brief walk a moment later, then Rukia arrived from her division and sat down with them.

Renji could barely contain himself as he tried each of the appetizers, then dove enthusiastically into the meal that was served to them. He couldn't seem to get his fill of the savory offerings and by the time he was finished with them, he was more than ready for the sweets served at the end of the meal.

"Hey Taichou, I thought you weren't fond of sweets," the redhead commented, smiling as he noticed that the clan leader was eating more politely, but was also devouring his food at an accelerated rate.

"I am usually not," Byakuya admitted, taking a large bite of warm, gooey molten fudge cake and a more sedate bite of the ice cream with it, "But it seems that I crave sweet things now."

"Heh, that's pretty cute, Taichou," the redhead chuckled.

"I am so happy that I could amuse you," Byakuya sighed around another bite of the warm, sweet fudge, "You look likewise enthralled with your meal."

"Well, it sure beats the hell out of what I'd be eating if I'd gone home tonight. It'd probably have been leftover noodles from earlier and a little ice cream, if it wasn't spoiled."

Byakuya lowered his eyes for a moment as he felt another twinge of sympathy surprise him.

"Well, you may certainly enjoy whatever you wish to eat, day or night while you are my guest here. Simply inform Akio, who will be your attendant, and he will provide whatever you need."

"Really? My own attendant, Taichou?"

Byakuya observed him for a moment out of the corner of a dark eye, then continued eating.

When their meal was concluded, the two adjourned to a building that stood at the end of the main wing and looked more like an indoor extension of the gardens. Renji studied the lovely flowers and trees that grew under the glass-domed ceiling of the chamber, then realized that the huge pool and waterfalls within the chamber were meant for bathing. He was startled for a moment as two dark haired youths appeared and undressed them, but he tried to look as calm about it as Byakuya did, figuring that it seemed to just be part of how the household ran. It did feel strange, he thought, to have someone else wash his body, but he couldn't help but feel warmed by the care in the hands of the attendant who had only just met him.

"Thanks Akio-san," he said politely as the youth worked the soap into his shoulders and back, then carefully washed his long, red hair.

"Sir, with your permission?" Akio said, pausing.

A blush roared over Renji's face, but he caught sight out of the corner of his eye at Byakuya, standing quietly as his attendant washed his ample privates and managed to offer a calm response.

"Uh, I'll handle them...ah th-that myself," he stammered, flushing even more brightly.

"Of course, Abarai-san," Akio said, stepping back.

"Just call me Renji," the redhead insisted.

"Very well, Renji-san."

Renji couldn't get the blush to leave his face as they finished their bathing and were fastidiously dried off and dressed in the softest, most comfortable yukatas that had ever touched Renji's rough skin. He was nearly asleep on his feet as they walked back to Byakuya's bedroom, where they sat down on the noble's bed to see to their bonding.

"Kotetsu fukutaichou said that we should plan to bond and balance our reiatsu about three times daily.

"That's a lot of belly rubs," Renji giggled, settling behind his taichou and wrapping his arms around Byakuya in the way they'd been shown.

A breath of sakura drifted across his senses as their bonding began and Renji felt a soft twitch in his nether region.

_He smells really good..._

The warmth where his hands touched Byakuya's soft abdomen excited him more and he felt his piqued member flinch again.

_Well, Taichou is really attractive, so I guess it's understandable. I just hope he's not offended._

But if Byakuya felt anything about it, he kept it to himself as the redhead saw to the balancing, then switched positions with the clan leader.

As Byakuya's arms wrapped around him and the infusion began, Renji felt a comfortable, sleepy sensation pass over him, and within moments, he had nodded off in Byakuya's embrace. As the clan leader finished the infusion, he started to speak to Renji, then noticed his fukutaichou was fast asleep. He started to wake him, then paused, admiring how comfortable and attractive Renji looked, relaxing in his embrace like that. Instead of waking him, then, he lowered Renji carefully onto the pillows, then laid down a respectful distance away on the bed.

But all distances disappeared as they slept and Renji turned and rolled into Byakuya's surprisingly affectionate feeling arms, then remained there for the rest of the night.


	5. Getting Naked

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Byakuya and Renji feel a growing attraction for each other.

It was strange, Byakuya thought, waking to find himself lying again in Renji's warm embrace and so very comfortable that he couldn't move to extract himself.

 _This_ , he mused, _is what I miss the most about being in love. Renji is not my lover, but this is the second time he has given me this beautiful feeling inside without even trying. But I have always admired Renji's ability to attract people to him. Were he a more calculated person, he would use this to seduce a long line of lovers, but he hasn't. He has actually been somewhat lonely because he doesn't use that ability recklessly. That Renji values so much finding the right person to give himself to, I feel sad that the strange tea we drank took away his choices about that, even for a moment. For Renji to find that special person would be a beautiful thing. As his taichou, I have seen him use this quality to grow our friendship. I can't begin to imagine what it would be like to be the person he finally fell in love with._

_But that can't happen with me._

_I know too much about opening my heart to someone like that. As beautiful as it is and as much as I treasured it, I know the unbearable pain it brings when it leaves. I know the dread weight of returning loneliness. I couldn't bear to suffer that loss again. And anyway, Renji doesn't see me through that lens. I am his mentor, even now a friend. But Renji doesn't see me as a lover. I won't expect love, then. But it is a deep pleasure to see him up close and to appreciate his beauty._

His mind quieted then, and he took silent pleasure in studying the fully relaxed and comfortably sleeping redhead, taking in the loveliness of the strong, muscular body he had worked so hard to perfect, the man's darker, handsomely tanned skin and bold black tattoos. He kept returning to those lovely, dark markings as the redhead slept in his arms. His eyes lazily followed and slowly memorized their enchanting patterns. He longed to peel back the folds of his sleeping friend's yukata and see them in their full complexity. While he had seen Renji naked on occasion, and he had certainly been aware of them, to have looked on them for any length of time would have been unforgivably rude, so he had been careful to look away, or to view them out of the corner of one eye always.

But, he wondered, was there really any harm in seeing them just once...looking in more detail as Renji comfortably slept?

A shaft of guilt went through him as his mind played out the scenario, how just a soft touch of relaxing reiatsu would make the redhead's sleep deepen so that he wouldn't wake while Byakuya laid him bare and studied the dark markings like a work of art...not in a sexual way, of course, but because they were beautiful.

_Yes, Renji is a very beautiful young man._

He felt himself beginning to harden and blushed furiously at how he had tried to deceive himself. He abandoned the bed and walked out into the dark gardens where he stood, looking up at the dark, starlit sky and blinking slowly to clear his mind.

_What happened to me?_

_Why did I have such thoughts? Did I not just decide that I could not ever be that man's lover? That the cost of loving Renji is too much for me to do so? It is so odd! My mind is content to be Renji's friend and comrade, but my body obviously wants to love his. Then again, my body already has loved Renji's. And as the memories of our coitus have come back to me, I do find them beautifully erotic. But no matter how enjoyable it was, it cannot overcome the memory of what it is to lose someone I love. And with the way I felt when Hisana died, how much worse would it be...!_

Byakuya froze, a sharp pain stabbing him inside as he realized.

_Kami, I am falling in love with him!_

_In fact, I may already be in love with the man. And I invited him to live under my own roof. I set a precedent by letting him fall asleep in my arms. But to step back now will probably upset him while he is in a more delicate state. I cannot step forward and I cannot step back._

_What am I to do?_

"You look like you have something kinda heavy on your mind," Renji's voice said suddenly, making the noble inhale sharply and turn to face the chuckling redhead.

Renji's smile faded slightly as he observed the somewhat haunted look that flashed across the noble's lovely features, then disappeared behind a mask of returning calm.

"Huh, I don't remember ever taking you by surprise," Renji commented, slipping an arm around Byakuya's waist and beginning a calm, balancing infusion, "You think the pregnancy's affecting your abilities that much already, Taichou?"

"Don't be ridiculous!" the noble snapped, more sharply than he meant to, "I was merely distracted...clan issues, strategies...I was..."

"You were a billion miles away. I get it," Renji answered, giving him a melting smile, "I figured. It was just fun to be able to do that for once."

"I am pleased I could amuse you," Byakuya said dryly, fighting to keep himself stiffened, but gradually finding his body relaxing into Renji's embrace and his eyes closing blissfully.

"That's better," Renji's deep voice breathed into his ear, sending flutters through his belly and making his heart quicken, "You're too tense, Taichou. We're supposed to try to stay relaxed. It's better for the baby."

"Did your healers tell you that?" Byakuya asked.

"No, that was in a book I was reading about having babies. You like to read. Have you been reading up too?"

"Not as yet," the noble answered, feeling a curious barb of guilt inside.

_I read all of the time...obsessively. Yet, it didn't occur to me to do so in preparation for the birth of our child? What is in my head?_

"Well, here, have a look at this one. It's pretty good, although, we won't have to worry about pushing the baby out and episiotomies and all..."

"P-pushing?" Byakuya repeated, blinking, "Episiotomy?"

"Yeah, where they..."

"I understand what one is, but why read a book about something that cannot begin to explain what is happening inside us?" the noble queried.

"Well, not all of it applies, sure," Renji admitted, "but it does kinda explain some of the hormone changes that are causing our feelings to be affected. Like that fluttery feeling I get in my belly when I look at you now. I was worried I was falling in love with you when that wouldn't be the best thing, but the book said that such things are a part of the bonding between parents...you know, old instincts that we have to protect the pregnant female and future baby or something. It made sense to me when I read it."

"I see. So, you are saying that what we feel is hormone induced and not real?" Byakuya asked, frowning.

"I didn't say that the feelings weren't real, or that they didn't mean anything," Renji corrected him, "What I'm saying is that the hormones just take what's there and intensify it to the extreme. It doesn't mean that there aren't real feelings there, just that nature is trying to help those feelings because they aid in survival."

"If we love each other and remain connected, we are better protected," the noble mused, frowning.

_By that logic, I should not be trying to keep myself from falling in love, but allowing it, embracing it even. But I know what happens when love fails to protect someone! How can I let those feelings take hold when they are no guarantee that I can deliver on the protection they promise?_

"You know, getting depressed is a part of pregnancy too," Renji commented.

"I am not depressed. I am merely thinking."

"Well, you're not thinking about sunshine and rainbows, are you? Don't worry about answering, it's obvious you're not thinking about something happy. I read that..."

"Protective feelings, however strong they may be, are no assurance one can protect the one he loves. You would do well to remember that, Abarai," Byakuya said, pulling free of the redhead and starting to turn away.

"Hey, aren't you forgetting something?" Renji asked, crossing his arms and raising an eyebrow.

_How stupid of me. He needs balancing too. What was I thinking?_

Byakuya turned back and wrapped his arms around Renji, gently infusing the redhead's warm, handsomely scented body with the calming reiatsu and closing his eyes against the wickedly pleasant feeling of it.

_I will not let it get to me. It is just nature trying to protect life. It doesn't mean that we are meant to be more than we are. Why can we not just be friends and share the beauty of parenthood as we have planned? Why does it have to be so complicated?_

He felt Renji's body relax in his embrace and closed his eyes, holding the redhead against him, continuing to infuse his impregnated belly and feeling palpably the strengthening of the bonds between them.

_Or am I just making it more complicated than it has to be?_

Byakuya somehow missed registering that Renji's body has achieved proper balance, and he continued to hold the redhead against him, breathing in his scent. His eyes opened again as he felt his handsome friend turn towards him, then felt a warm press of rough lips against his cheek that tickled him deeply inside and made him blush.

"Thanks Taichou," Renji said, extracting himself from the noble's arms, "I feel better now. But I'm still pretty sleepy. I'll see you later, okay?"

"Very well."

_Why do I want to stop him from going? He is just going back to sleep? He is not leaving the manor. But it's like I feel every step he takes away from me, and I do not want him to go._

He blinked in surprise as Renji paused and turned back to look at him questioningly.

"You know, I think a warm shower might help me calm down enough to sleep a little more. You want to join me, Taichou?"

Byakuya found himself nodding automatically in assent and moving to join the redhead, even as he thought of more than a few reasons why he shouldn't.

_It is really dishonest, at this point, pretending that I don't have an interest in seeing him naked. But to say something could be disastrous._

He settled, then, for following the redhead into the bathing chamber and quietly undressing just a few feet away from where Renji was doing the same. They waded out into the warm pool, side by side.

 _And scandalously alone_ , Byakuya added inwardly, _I should have at least summoned our attendants._

But he swiftly abandoned all thoughts of doing so as Renji's tall, lanky form captured his attention. As the noble stood beneath the calm fall of water, his peripheral vision picked up the enthralling view of that handsome, tanned and tattooed body turning slowly beneath the waterfall, giving him every angle and allowing him to view and memorize each marking as it was. He was careful not to look directly, but he certainly did see everything. And seeing, even out of the corner of an eye made him ache inside. He felt the ache spread into his hungry loins, then into his belly.

_But it is no lack of food I suffer. I know what this is. I know exactly what it is. I do not need a book to tell me._

_I want to make love to Renji again._

_And this time, I don't want there to be any odd tea involved...just us._

_But that is not necessarily what Renjui wants. And I do not want to make things awkward by trying to ask him anything. It is better to say nothing and just to enjoy what he is offering...his company, his friendship and the mutual parenting and love of our children. That should be enough for us...shouldn't it?_

"Taichou?"

Byakuya felt an inward jolt that he had turned his head to look directly at Renji without realizing. He quickly averted his eyes again, but he sensed that the damage was already done.

"It's okay."

Unsure what the redhead was referring to, he said nothing in reply and made no further eye contact.

"I think you're beautiful too."

He couldn't help but seek Renji's eyes then, and the impact weakened his knees.

"Wh-what?"

"Come on," the redhead chuckled, "I'm not that stupid."

"I do not think you're stupid."

"I know you wanted to see me naked."

"Renji..."

"I wanted to see you naked too. What's wrong with that? So, we're attracted to each other. There's nothing wrong with that, right?"

"Well, no, but..."

"So we got naked and looked a little. Nobody got hurt, right?"

"Abarai!" the noble hissed, blushing more brightly as he snatched away the towel Renji offered him and covered himself.

"What are you getting so flustered for?" Renji laughed, shaking his head, "I said it was okay. We're already having babies together. It's not like we could get into any more trouble, ne?"

"That is not the point."

"No," Renji said, sobering slightly, "I guess it's not. And I'm sorry if I embarrassed you. Look, maybe I should just go back to my place and come here for the infusions. I'm making you uncomfortable."

"No, you are not," Byakuya insisted, "It is just the hormonal changes."

He froze as Renji leaned forward and tugged him into a scathingly beautiful kiss that left him unable to think, let alone object.

"I think we both know it's more than that," Renji said, still giving him a small, charming smile, "and I don't want to put pressure on you. You obviously have some thinking you're trying to do and I'm getting in your way."

Byakuya started to object, but was stopped by the touch of Renji's rough fingertips on his surprised lips.

"Don't bullshit me. You are thinking. Just...do that. Think. I'm not going anywhere, just getting dressed and going back to my place to give you a little room to breathe. And don't think you're the only one who needs it. If I had my way, I'd be kissing you again already and we'd be going back to your bedroom."

"You...?"

"Yeah, I want to make love to you again. I'm not going to lie about that. But it may not be what we both want, so I'll let you think about it."

"I...haven't been with anyone in a long time."

"Except for me," Renji teased, giggling.

"Except then," Byakuya corrected himself, loosing a brusque sigh, "It is a rather large step forward."

"Well, we've got a while, but..."

Renji paused and looked down at his abdomen, an expression of surprise and happiness flooding his eyes.

"What is it?" Byakuya asked curiously as Renji grabbed his hand and brought it to his belly.

"Can you feel that? The reiatsu cluster in me...It's moving!"

"It isn't just moving," Byakuya whispered, reaching out with his senses, "The new soul senses us!"

"I can feel it too," Renji said, happy tears leaking onto his face, "Taichou! Taichou, this is...incredible!"

Byakuya continued to enjoy the touch of that other sentience that brushed sweetly against his.

_This child is a girl._

_We are having a little baby girl!_

"It's a girl, isn't it?" Renji queried shakenly, echoing the noble's thoughts.

"Yes."

"But, if we can feel my baby's reiatsu, shouldn't we be able to feel yours too?"

"Sentience isn't an exact thing," Byakuya explained, "The child within me may be developing more slowly, and it does not indicate a problem. They are, after all, two individual souls. Every soul is different."

"Well, let me try, okay?" Renji requested, reaching down and resting a hand on Byakuya's belly, "Come on, kiddo, your daddies want to know you're in there."

"Renji..." the noble chided him.

"I think I can feel something," the redhead mused, taking Byakuya's hand and bringing it to rest where his had been, "See?"

Byakuya felt the soft swell of life under his fingers and froze instantly.

_The baby I am having is a boy. We are going to have a son as well!_

"It's a boy, right?" Renji echoed his thoughts again, "I guess you have your heir, huh?"

"Renji, an heir needn't be male to be accepted," Byakuya scolded him quietly, "That is an old custom that the clans have cast off. A male or female may inherit leadership. The leader considers all of the heirs and chooses the one he or she feels will best serve."

"You mean you could choose either of them?"

"I could. But I will respect your wishes if you do not want her to be considered."

"Why wouldn't I want her to be?"

Byakuya looked back at him solemnly.

"Nobility is not an easy life, and although half bloods like my cousin are more accepted, it might be easier to choose a different path. I thought that you would, perhaps, want her life to be less complicated."

"I guess it could be," Renji thought aloud, "but, you know, as much as I don't want things to be more complicated than they have to be? I want her to know and love both of her parents. I want her to be proud of who she is, all of who she is."

Byakuya couldn't stop the smile that invaded at the words.

"Thank you, Renji," he said gratefully, "I want the same."

He thought for a moment longer, then looked into the redhead's happy eyes.

"I have done enough thinking for now," he said calmly, "I want you to stay here. I don't want you to leave. I will not rush into...any more than we have already done, but neither will I deny I am attracted to you. We shall simply...go on and see how things develop. Is that acceptable to you?"

"Sure!" Renji laughed, "Come on. We should get our clothes back on before I change my mind."


	6. Deeper

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Byakuya and Renji grow closer and make an astonishing discovery!

_I shouldn't let myself get so used to this_ , Byakuya chided himself as he woke to find himself, once again, curled comfortably into Renji's arms and so warm and relaxed that he didn't ever want to move, _What will happen when the babies come and Renji leaves Kuchiki Manor?_

He hadn't considered himself to be unhappy or lonely before, he reminded himself firmly. But even the thought of waking up without Renji next to him gave him little twinges of emotion. And he gradually had to admit to himself that while he might have been at peace before, he wasn't entirely happy. No, he might have been content, but he wasn't happy.

_Because being happy instead of content carries with it the danger of losing that happiness. Still, even just contentment can end in loss. I'm fooling myself, aren't I? And if I don't do something soon, Renji will leave and I won't even be able to be content anymore._

"You're inside your head again, aren't you?" Renji asked softly, startling the noble out of his thoughts, "You look kind of sad, Taichou. What's wrong?"

Byakuya looked into his eyes quietly, considering his words carefully.

_We are both in an oddly vulnerable state now, with the increased hormones affecting how we interact. But these strong feelings I have for Renji...are they just because we are bearing each other's children, or is this a deeper connection we've built? Have I already stepped over that line I promised I wouldn't?_

_I don't know what to do._

"I am sorry," Byakuya said finally, "Despite having every intention of being sensible through all of this, I admit I am sometimes confused. I do not know if what I feel when I wake up next to you is instinctive or if it is just..."

"You're over-thinking it," Renji chuckled, smirking and slipping his arms around his troubled friend, "Look, you don't need to be so serious. You're attracted to me, for whatever reason and I'm attracted to you. We can just enjoy that, for what it's worth. We don't have to overanalyze it or make any decisions now."

Byakuya reflected silently on the words as the redhead's palms rubbed his warm belly and Renji infused his body with calming reiatsu.

"It's not like we're in a rush," Renji went on, "We've got all this time while the babies are growing. There's no pressure. The elders aren't bugging us because they know we didn't really do anything wrong and we can't help what happened."

"That is true," Byakuya agreed, closing his eyes and leaning back against Renji's muscular chest.

He breathed in the redhead's warm, masculine scent and felt a haziness stealing over him. A longing seemed to well up from deep inside him and he found his head turning slightly and his lips seeking his red-haired friend's. Renji smiled and greeted them readily, keeping his arms lightly wrapped around his skittish superior officer as they kissed. One hand continued to caress his abdomen gently, while the other began to meander slowly upward.

"You mind if I touch you a little?" Renji breathed into his ear, sending little flickers of arousal all through him.

"It's fine," he assured the younger man, keeping his eyes closed and feeling the flush on his skin deepen as Renji's rough fingertips lightly brushed against a scandalously aroused nipple.

"I'll stop if you feel uncomfortable with it," Renji assured him.

"I'm not unwilling," Byakuya confessed a bit breathlessly as the pleasant contact continued, "I don't know if it is as you said and that it's that the increased hormones are to blame or if this is something else, but I have to admit I desire this."

"Me too," Renji confessed, teasing one blushing nipple, then moving on to stimulate the other, "I really like touching you this way. You know, when I'm not with you, I think about touching you a lot."

"You do?" Byakuya queried, blinking in surprise.

"Well, you think about touching me, don't you, Taichou?" the redhead asked, his breath tickling Byakuya's flushed cheek and throat.

"I do."

"I guess it's not wrong if we play with each other a little while we're like this. I'm not asking you to make me any promises about what will happen later. I don't think we're really able to think straight with our bodies being affected like they are."

A small flutter of warning registered in the noble's mind, but he brushed it off and continued to explore Renji's hot, receptive tongue and the sweet depths of his mouth. The redhead laid back against the pile of soft pillows, spreading his thighs as Byakuya turned into his arms and settled between them.

_I haven't kissed anyone like this since Hisana. And honestly, I was always gentle with her in a way I can't be with this man. He's strong. His body is firm and muscular all over. That kind of flesh doesn't want to be loved gently. Because of his youth in Inuzuri, his lips and fingers are rough. He seems sensitive about it, but I love how different they feel! I just wonder if he thinks I'm too soft._

Byakuya realized suddenly that his eyes were closed, and he opened them to find himself looking deeply into Renji's, then falling into the fiery, red-brown orbs helplessly. The redhead's hungry mouth kissed the reeling noble's harder and his hands gripped Byakuya's soft bottom more tightly, pulling lightly to encourage him to move. The Kuchiki heir yielded easily, rubbing his exposed member against Renji's and creating delicious friction that excited moans of contentment from both of the spellbound men.

 _I want so much to make love to you_ , Byakuya thought, gazing into Renji's devouring eyes and feeding voraciously on his biting mouth, _That desire has become so powerful...so hard to resist._

_I don't want to resist it anymore._

He rocked his hips back slowly and teased the redhead's vulnerable entrance, while keeping their eyes locked. Renji froze for a moment, looking back at him quietly.

"You sure you want to do that?" he asked calmly, watching the noble's expression carefully, "Because I want to, but I don't want to do it if it's going to make you unhappy."

Byakuya held his body still and nuzzled beneath Renji's chin, breathing in the redhead's intoxicating scent and trying desperately to think coherently.

"I don't know how I will feel afterward," Byakuya confessed, "I cannot think that far ahead."

"Hmmm, maybe we should stop and take a few breaths," Renji suggested, "take a walk in the gardens or have tea or breakfast."

"Perhaps," Byakuya agreed, sitting up slowly and putting a hand to his still dizzy head, "But I mustn't neglect you."

He bent over the redhead, trying not to notice Renji's handsomely flushed face, cute, rounded belly and extremely aroused genitals. But as much as he tried not to look, they teased him shamelessly as he completed the needed infusion. His hands trembled softly and his heart pounded wantonly as he drew back, struggling to control himself. Sensing his discomfort, Renji rolled onto his feet and mercifully covered himself.

"Sorry," he apologized, "Things got a little hot and heavy there for a moment. You're...not mad, are you?"

"No," Byakuya answered, touching cool fingertips to his own flushed cheek, "I am not angry. I am flustered. We should take that walk in the gardens."

"Okay," Renji laughed, "But are you sure you don't want me to leave for a while? I think I'm tempting you too much."

"You are very tempting," Byakuya confessed, "but I would much rather suffer that temptation than to..."

He froze, stunned by the words that had almost escaped him and unnerved at the implications.

_Yes. I was going to say that if he left, I would be lonely. So, it doesn't matter that I am still trying to protect my heart. I am falling head over heels for this man and there is nothing I can do about it!_

Renji's arms wrapped around him bracingly and the noble felt a chill run down his spine at the words whispered into his ear.

"I think I'm gonna go, Taichou. You look really unsettled."

"Don't."

Renji looked back at him, his expression becoming serious.

"You know you're not ready for this," he said firmly, disengaging himself and stepping back, "We don't want to become too dependant on each other. We're going to separate when the babies are born, right?"

Byakuya swallowed hard, not daring to answer.

"It would be different if we planned to raise the kids together, but we're kind of teasing each other. Don't worry. I'm not mad," Renji assured him, "I'll come back tonight for the next infusion. But I think I'd better go home and let you have some space before we do something that'll make things harder for us later."

He stepped closer and kissed the shocked noble on the cheek.

"See you later, Taichou, okay?"

Byakuya remained silent and unmoving as Renji watched for a moment, then turned and started to walk away.

_I don't want you to go._

_Renji, don't leave!_

"Stop," Byakuya said sternly, the calm in his own voice surprising him.

Renji paused and turned to look at him questioningly.

"You are wrong about something," the noble persisted, taking a step forward, "I need to cure you of that misperception."

"Oh?" Renji queried, blinking in surprise.

Byakuya gave a barely perceptible nod and moved closer to the redhead, then slipped a hand into his. Renji held his breath, staring raptly at the noble as he continued.

"You said that we are teasing each other," Byakuya explained, "And you have alluded to your thinking that I have no intention of taking our relationship further. You constantly indicate your willingness to give more, but you stop us from moving forward because you sense I am not ready."

"Well...yeah," Renji agreed, "Is there something wrong with me not wanting to push you into something you don't want to do?"

"That is where your misperception lies," Byakuya said, tightening his hand on the redhead's, "You are assuming that I will only go so far and then I will be able to go no farther."

"Well, isn't that how it is with you?" Renji asked, frowning, "You know, I get that you lost Hisana, and that's made it hard for you to move on. That's why I don't want to be pushy."

"But you also shouldn't back off every time I am tempted by you."

"What?" the redhead mused, a sweetly confused expression taking over his handsome face, "You're not making sense."

"Oh, I think I am," Byakuya insisted, moving closer and sliding his arms around the redhead, confining him, "You see, I am not just 'being tempted by you and backing away,' Renji."

"You're not?" Renji asked breathlessly, "Then...?"

"I was distraught at losing my wife and I was determined that I would never make myself vulnerable that way. Just as you said before, I wasn't ready and I am still not completely ready to do that. But will you really walk away from me because I am not ready? Do you think I do not want to move forward? Renji, recovery from any horrible thing like that comes slowly. You are the first person I've fallen in love with in over fifty years, only the second person I have been in love with in my entire life. Are you going to walk away now, just when I am starting to see that there is no protection in trying to keep myself apart from love?"

Renji's face paled visibly and he stared back at the noble as Byakuya's words repeated loudly in his head.

"You're in love with me really?" he repeated numbly, barely registering the words, "You're already in love with me?"

"Yes, you fool!" Byakuya snapped, dragging the stunned redhead into a long, almost brutal kiss, "I am already in love with you and I know that walking away isn't an option anymore. We will have to move slowly, but this can work out if you will stop trying to figure me out and listen to what I am telling you!"

"Okay!" Renji laughed shakily, accepting another long, penetrating kiss, "Fine, I won't leave, all right? I'll stay. But we should do something to take the pressure off, don't you think? Unless you want me to have sex with you right now?"

"I think we will take that walk in the gardens," the noble answered, giving him a smoky glare, "The fresh air should clear our minds sufficiently to think properly."

"Maybe for you," Renji said, smirking as he accepted the noble's hand and the two started walking, "But the gardens smell like sakura, just like you do. It's like twice the torment for me, walking here, next to you."

"Then, perhaps we should go somewhere else."

"It's all right, Taichou," Renji assured him, "I was joking."

"We'll go into the archive," Byakuya suggested.

"The Kuchiki archive?" Renji repeated, his eyes widening, "Really?"

"Yes. There are family histories, dating back thousands of years...stories that read like myth, but are supposed to have really happened. I think that we can distract ourselves with that, don't you?"

"Yeah," Renji chuckled, "And if we're going to be lovers, then I should get to know as much as possible about your family. I wish I could tell you about my family, but I don't even know who they are or if any of them are still alive."

"Well," Byakuya said bracingly, "as you are having my child, you are now connected to the Kuchiki family, and that will be true whether we become lovers or not."

"That's pretty damned cool," Renji laughed softly, following as Byakuya led him towards the archive entrance, "Almost a Kuchiki..."

They followed the wooden walkway to a large, dark cherry wood door that was covered with raised markings. Renji looked closer, admiring the fine detail, then perfect craftsmanship of just the door.

_And if that's great, I just wonder what it's like inside. I never thought he'd take me in there. The Kuchiki archive was a gift given to the first Kuchiki clan leader by the soul king, himself! I can't wait to see the inside._

And whatever he had imagined was immediately put to shame as Byakuya touched a pale palm to the door and it opened in front of them, revealing the huge chamber inside.

A short, dark paneled entry led into the sprawling interior, and Renji realized suddenly that there was no way that something so massive could exist within the building they had been standing in front of.

"Taichou...?"

"The archive is not actually in Soul Society, nor within Kuchiki Manor," Byakuya explained, "It exists in a small pocket dimension that connects directly to the royal realm through that door."

Renji stared in amazement at the golden door on the far end of the chamber.

"Only the clan leader and the royal family may use that doorway. It leads into the king's archive, so that I can use the materials there as well."

"That's amazing, Taichou," Renji said appreciatively, looking around, "but we should've brought some snacks if we're going to be in here for a while."

"There is a bedroom and kitchen over there," the noble indicated, "Why don't you make us some tea while I pick out a few things for us to look at?"

"Sounds good," Renji said agreeably.

He walked past several walls that contained floor to ceiling bookshelves and here and there were glass cases that contained displays of older, more fragile books, and to Renji's surprise, a number of very old weapons that had to have belonged to Byakuya's own forebears.

"This place is unbelievable," he breathed, stepping into the alcove that Byakuya had pointed out and looking around.

He quickly located the kitchen and hastily prepared their tea, then returned to where Byakuya sat, looking at the cover of an old, weathered text. Renji caught his breath in surprise at the picture of the man on the cover, who looked younger than Byakuya, but remarkably similar except for his large blue eyes.

"Who is that?" the redhead asked, setting their tea on the table in front of them, "He kinda looks like a cross between you and your cousin, Tetsuya-san."

"That is Kuchiki Hajime," Byakuya said, smiling and touching the portrait with gentle fingertips, "He was born in the king's gardens, made by the king's own hands. He was the very first Kuchiki and the king's consort."

"Whoa...but I thought that the king was..."

"The king is a soul, just like you and me, but he is also a transcendent. Every thousand or so years, to continue his existence, his soul must be renewed. An heir is born, and when it is time for him or her to take the throne, the previous king and consort are drawn into the prism, where they are able to share their wisdom with the new royals."

"I don't know. It sounds a little creepy, being stuck in a big crystal thing like that."

"I don't know," Byakuya confessed, "But I think it would be a great honor to act as guide to future kings."

Byakuya started to set the book back on the table, then paused, frowning as a slip of paper fell out and fluttered down to land on the floor. The two men stared at the drawing of a tall red-haired man pictured in the middle of a jumping strike, his jagged toothed sword raised high over his head and his fierce face promising death. All over his body, bold black tattoos decorated his deeply tanned skin.

"Taichou!" Renji exclaimed, grabbing the drawing and staring in shock, "Taichou, who is that?"

"I don't know," Byakuya whispered, shaking his head, "There is a lot about Hajime's time that no one really remembers. I only recently found that text and I am in the middle of translating it. But given how much that man resembles you, I think we may have stumbled on a bit of your history."


End file.
